I simply parked my rental, a truck of all things, and got out and wandered down to the dock. I didn't think I would have to wait too long for someone to either be coming or going so I sat down on the grass near the boat ramp and waited. Two hours later I was awakened by the sound of a boat approaching the landing. I got up and dusted the grass of my jeans as best I could and waited for it to arrive. As they neared the dock I could see that there were three older men and one young teenager in the boat. I walked out toward the end of the dock, and as the approached I asked the older guy sitting in the bow of the boat, “How's it going?” He looked at me kind of strange, since I am sure he knew that I wasn't a local, “Eh, not too bad. The fishing won't fer shit today though. Here, catch.” He tossed me the bow line and I tied it off to the cleat near my feet as the boat drifted toward the dock. The teenager tied off the rear as the guys started unloading their gear. One of the other. I had lived a miserable existence and yet I survived; an optimist without much to be optimistic about. Most of the guys thought I was attractive in a way, but not a beauty. Midge said it crossed her mind more than once that I would make the right guy a very happy man, but he'd better not cross me.I broke down and accepted some dates from a few of the regular customers I knew weren't married. It usually involved a movie or occasionally even a dance at the local tavern, but almost always ended up in the back seat of some car. When I finally surrendered my virginity, it was almost like I was giving up. I handed my date a condom and made sure he used it.It was painful and pointless. I had no personal tie to the guy, and today I couldn't recall his name. The sex wasn't scary, but didn't feel like what I expected or wanted. Disappointing, I guess you could call it.I tried with a few other dates, but again, never had any real enjoyment from the sex. It was just ... sex. It was often over.
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